Buhlak Lunges
by Agent Dalton
Summary: CSM writes a new story, and yes I do know how to spell. Just read it!


Buhlak Lunges  
  
By Agent Dalton  
  
Rated PG (I think, maybe lower. I just wanna be on the safe side)  
  
Summary: Oh, I don't know. Just read it.  
  
Archive: Just fine and dandy with me  
  
Feedback: Puhleeeze?  
  
Disclaimer: sighs Not this again... Mmmmmkay, Mista C. you know you own them. I don't. Anyways, did anyone ever get sued for writing fanfic??? Email me at Cello6909@aol.com if you know.   
  
A beginning note: For any people who just stumbled into the X-Files section and have no idea about anything X, here's a few things:  
CSM stands for Cigarette Smoking Man. He's a man who smokes cigarettes  
WMM stands for Well Manicured Man. He says "My God" really cool  
  
"I hope the magazine will accept my story", CSM thought, "I have worked very hard on this one."  
  
CSM made his way to the meeting. He and his fellow lurkers were supposed to be be discussing important things, such as colonization and spam. All that could wait. His story was the most important thing on his agenda.  
  
When he got to the meeting he handed Well Manicured Man the stack of papers his story was on. "Read it.", he said.  
  
WMM quickly read the story. "Uh, very nice. Much better than your last one."  
  
After CSM left, WMM turned around to Krycek and said discreetly, "I cannot lie, that was absolutely hideous. It is not what I call satisfactory."  
  
"Give him time. It has only been a few days since Mulder totally kicked his ass.", Krycek said.  
  
"Mulder kicked his ass?!? My God, I never thought he could do that.", WMM exclaimed.  
  
"Well he did. It's pretty hard to believe, huh?", Krycek said.  
  
"Yes", WMM said, "I must be going now. My grandson has broken his leg again. I'll be back in about an hour."  
  
  
"Oh, hello Walter!", CSM said as he burst into Skinner's office.  
  
"Since when have you been calling me Walter?", Skinner asked inquisitively  
  
"Since today! I have a new story done. I am so happy about it!", CSM exclaimed.  
  
"Well", Skinner said, "Let me read it"  
  
"Of course!", CSM said as he thrust him the papers.  
  
"Very nice. Uh, keep up the good work", Skinner said as he put on a fake smile. "By the way, what are all those bruises from?"  
  
"Oh, Mulder totally kicked my ass."  
  
"He did?"  
  
"Yeah, hard to believe, huh?"  
  
"Yes, I guess it is.  
  
  
CSM was so excited, he decided to put it up on the overhead for the whole consortium to see.  
  
"Gentlemen", he began, "I will be having a special viewing of my story this evening. If you would like to attend please sign this sheet", he said as he found a blank piece of paper from his stack.  
  
All of the people present signed up, of course. They didn't want to know what would happen if the didn't.  
  
  
"Hello everybody, welcome to the viewing of my new story. I will put it up in a few moments.", CSM said happily.  
  
"This will be horrendous", WMM whispered to the lurker standing next to him. "It is a hideous story."  
  
CSM walked back into the room carrying a small stack of overhead transparencies. He put one on the overhead and everyone began to read...  
  
Miy Live  
By Calvin Gertrude Bernard Spender  
  
I am a nyce persin fer reel! I whont relly kill Froahicky er Sckully er Moulder cuz I am relly nyce! Moulder calles mie a bulack luhnged basteredt and ite mahkes mie sad. I chry beecuz of it sumtimes! I wish i dint keill allof thoose faymus peeple when I was yunger cuz keilling is rella bade. Wahlter is bald and hie shood becum hareclub fer menn spokeman! I nead to stop smokin cuz it rella, rella bad! I nead to get a compooter with werd porcessre cuz my tiperiter suckes. The docters say I gotta riting disorder but I saide I dint! Cuz I donte!  
  
WMM sighed as CSM put up the next page. This would be a long evening indeed.  
  
Fin  
  
Author's notes:  
I wrote this piece when I had a temperature of 103.4 a couple of days ago. I was a little bit crazy, and this is the result of my craziness. I know this is really short, but it's hard to write a good one when you fall asleep every 10 minutes. I would really appreciate some feedback so I can know if I should go on a mad writing rush the next time I get sick. Over and out.  
  



End file.
